How to Talk Across Divides: A Lesson from an Ancient Conversation

Why Conversations Feel Hard Today

Even small talk feels risky lately. Mention a coffee shop, a ball game, or a TV show, and it can turn political. Many topics seem to carry hidden tripwires.

My Christian faith gives me hope and direction, and I want to share that with others. But I’ve seen how quickly conversations can shut down when beliefs differ. So how can we talk with grace instead of frustration?

A Story from Ancient Athens

When Paul, the early Christian missionary, arrived in Athens two thousand years ago, he found a city buzzing with ideas—poets sharing wisdom, philosophers debating, altars lining the streets. Scripture notes he was “deeply distressed to see that the city was full of idols” (Acts 17:16).

Yet when invited to speak at the Areopagus (Mars Hill), a stone court where thinkers gathered, Paul didn’t lead with outrage. He began with observation: “People of Athens! I see that you are extremely religious in every aspect” (Acts 17:22).

He’d walked their streets, listened to their conversations, and even quoted their poets: “For in Him we live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:28). Then he pointed to their altar “To an unknown god” and said, in essence: “What you worship in ignorance, I now proclaim to you—the God who made the world, gave life to all, and calls us to know Him through His Son, Jesus Christ” (Acts 17:23–31).

Paul showed restraint and courage. He didn’t attack their ignorance; he met their curiosity. Some mocked him, others were intrigued, and a few believed. It wasn’t a mass conversion—it was a truthful exchange offered without force. Even today, this models how to share faith thoughtfully.

Step 1: Pay Attention to Their World

Paul didn’t start by preaching; he observed and listened. His clarity and courage flowed from his relationship with Jesus, not personal cleverness. This reminds us that sharing faith from our own strength risks missing the mark.

In my neighborhood, a father set up a basketball goal for his daughters and leaves it open for all kids, even when he’s away. That simple act speaks volumes. I could walk past, or I could stop, shoot a few baskets, and glimpse what drives him. Paying attention opens such doors.

As James 1:19 advises, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak.” I need this reminder—sometimes I’m too eager to share and need to pause and truly hear others.

Step 2: Find Common Ground

Paul built a bridge by quoting Athenian poets. I look for bridges too—shared hopes or questions. It might happen in a grocery line or at a town-square concert. I don’t have easy social “ins” like kids’ games or club meetings, but I meet people at the store, library, or community events. Brief chats about weather, music, or daily life can reveal shared humanity.

Common ground isn’t about matching lifestyles; it’s about seeing people as they are.

Step 3: Understand Why Some Hesitate

Talk of faith can make people flinch, often because they’ve seen religion used as pressure rather than invitation. I can’t “convince” anyone—that’s the Holy Spirit’s work. My part is to speak truthfully and lovingly, trusting God with the outcome.

I’ll admit, sharing faith feels daunting. I worry about stumbling over words or being seen as a “holy-roller know-it-all.” Maybe you’ve felt that too. But I’m learning to push past those fears, trusting that even imperfect words can plant a seed God will nurture. If one person pauses to reflect or feels a spark of curiosity, that’s enough—God works in His timing.

Step 4: Speak Gently and Authentically

Paul declared Jesus risen from the dead—plainly, respectfully, even when some sneered (Acts 17:32). Similarly, a conversation doesn’t need a clever line or dramatic moment. When friends lament the world’s brokenness, I might say, “That’s why Christ’s hope means so much to me—it’s the only thing that makes sense.” A gentle, authentic word plants deeper roots than loud arguments. As Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

I recall a friend who lost out on a job promotion. I said, “Maybe it wasn’t the right time—sometimes what we want isn’t what we need.” Drawing from my 30-year career, that simple reflection opened an honest conversation, giving him room to think differently. Authenticity, not perfection, sparks curiosity and leaves space for God to work.

The Weight and Wonder of Caring

I care deeply for friends—some I grew up with—who’ve turned from Christ, wrestling with injustice, hypocrisy, or a desire to steer their own lives. That aches. But I remind myself that the Christ I know may not be the one they’ve seen in others’ actions. This keeps me from taking rejection personally. If sharing Him costs discomfort, that’s a small price for obedience.

Over Casual Conversation

Talking across divides is rarely easy, but it’s worth the effort. By noticing others’ worlds, finding shared humanity, and speaking faith with gentle authenticity, we can spark curiosity without pressure. Like Paul on Mars Hill, we can stand in our own spaces—whether a town square or online—and trust God to make every conversation holy ground.

Post Script: I’d love to hear your thoughts or reflections in the comments: How do you authentically share your faith? Or, if you face your own barriers, what are they?

Scripture References above are Christian Standard Bible unless otherwise marked):

• Acts 17:16–34, for the full account of Paul’s experience.
• James 1:19
• Proverbs 15:1

Further Reading:

• If you’d like to read more about what happened at Mars Hill, read here at my favorite Bible reference site, GotQuestions.org: What happened at Mars Hill in the Bible?

Photo Credit:

• O.Mustafin. ‘The Areopagus as viewed from the Acropolis.’